livingmyths (
livingmyths) wrote2008-11-22 08:35 pm
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Entry tags:
038: Confessions
I'm kind of crazy and... broken.
I don't always know what's real and what isn't.
I have to carry things with me all the time to feel safe. Stupid things. things I know can't do anything, but without them I get so panicked I can't function.
I wonder all the time about the things I know
Being here... so much of what I believe has been challenged and it's so hard. Even when it's good it hurts.
Am I responsible for my mother's death? I ran instead trying to help her. Am I a whore for the things I've done? I let people have sex with me to get things I needed for me or the little ones. Could I have saved more of the children? I watched so many of them die...
If so much of what I knew is lies, so much of what I based me on, then who am I?
Am I real? Am I even here or have I finally lost all hold on reality and created this crazy imaginary City in my head, while my body is locked up in some crazy ward?
I don't always know what's real and what isn't.
I have to carry things with me all the time to feel safe. Stupid things. things I know can't do anything, but without them I get so panicked I can't function.
I wonder all the time about the things I know
Being here... so much of what I believe has been challenged and it's so hard. Even when it's good it hurts.
Am I responsible for my mother's death? I ran instead trying to help her. Am I a whore for the things I've done? I let people have sex with me to get things I needed for me or the little ones. Could I have saved more of the children? I watched so many of them die...
If so much of what I knew is lies, so much of what I based me on, then who am I?
Am I real? Am I even here or have I finally lost all hold on reality and created this crazy imaginary City in my head, while my body is locked up in some crazy ward?
voice
Re: voice
voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
Re: voice
no subject
no subject
And when people here really realize it... they'll hate me too.
I don't want you to hate me, when you know how... everything I am.
no subject
You've seen how broken I am too.
no subject
I did my bad things.
no subject
no subject
Well, you've always been so very good to me. Whatever happened before you are a very good person.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
no subject
no subject
Of course, that might be exactly the sort of thing my crazy mind would make up to keep me thinking all this was real.
no subject
In my limited experience.
no subject
I hope you're right.
no subject
no subject
Are you cursed today as well?
no subject
No, it doesn't look like I've been cursed today. Not yet, at least.
no subject